The Short of It

I asked anyone I could about how their time at a monastery was before I went. How was it? Did it change you? Are you more zen now? Can you meditate better? Now I understand their answers, which were always kind of vague and passive, but happy.

 My time at the monastery was everything. It was happy, sad, frustrating, angry, upsetting, beautiful, wonderful, scary, boring, exciting, deep. I experienced just about every emotion on a daily basis. I am still in amazement at how strong my mind is. And I don't mean strong as in willpower strong. I mean strong as in stubborn. It's a miracle I have ever been able to put my mind to anything it didn't want to do. (Now that I'm thinking about it...have I?...) I have a mind that will throw you on your back if you get it in a corner. Because that's what it did to me. My first half of my stay was in silence, something that is no small feat and should always be regarded as a super power if you ever come across someone who can be in true silence for longer than a day. The silence turned my mind on itself and began to form long, run-on sentences about my inabilities and yell them into my ear. Those sentences turned into paragraphs as the week went on, and eventually (and I am being literal here) I was having full blown arguments in my mind, with my mind.
 By the time I left, I felt really connected to the energy there, and was almost sad to leave it. I left this morning with some of the peace that I went there looking for. I wrote several entries while I was there, which I will post with pictures tomorrow. I had a really good experience, and even though I still am not the best mediater on the block, I had some really beautiful experiences this week. Know that I am doing well, and I hope that you guys are too. 

-H